Sundays With Rae

a blog for women by a woman who is trying to get her life together while still loving Jesus

Not All Dates Are Good…

Have you ever been on a date so terrible, it made you consider being a nun? Okay, this date wasn’t that bad but it wasn’t good, like, at all. My name is Jocee, and this is my story.

He was almost seven feet tall, caramel complexion, muscular build, with a few dreadlocks on the top of his head that were brown at the tips. They had been freshly re-twisted which sounds like a good thing but it wasn’t. He had on a muscle shirt with joggers that were tighter than my jeans and if I had the courage, I would have walked out of the lobby of that movie theater then but I told myself I needed to be open minded and just because I didn’t like how the gift was wrapped, didn’t mean it wasn’t a gift. After all, he had drove over an hour to go to the movies with me which sounds sweet but was a red flag. None of our conversations had been very in depth, so he really didn’t know me well enough for such a sacrifice to be considered sweet. But again, I’m trying to be open minded, maybe the Lord told him something that He didn’t tell me.

As soon as we sit down in our seats, I could already see what kind of afternoon it was going to be. Some people enjoy talking throughout a movie. I’m not necessarily opposed to this if I know you and we can laugh about things together. This was not one of those situations. He commented on the commercial before the movie regarding his car being better than the car that was in the advertisement. He commented on the commercial about tipping the waitress (dine in movie). He commented about putting his phone on silent. This was all before the actual movie came on! I’m sure he was nervous like I was, and perhaps this was his way of trying to loosen things up but it was not working. The movies is not a good first date, especially if you’re not doing dinner too, and to add insult to injury he asked what I enjoyed doing and the movies was not on my list (although I do enjoy the movies), so a part of me thinks he just wanted to see this movie. Once the movie got started, things didn’t get any better.

At some point he alluded to us being in a relationship and him protecting me from bad guys… Sir, I don’t even know if I would want to be your friend. He asked what I would do if he was as short as one of the characters in the movie, which to me felt like he thought he was better than because he was over six feet tall. Little did he know, I would have much rather been sitting next to a guy who was five feet and would let me enjoy the movie in peace.

All of this was annoying if nothing else, but the worst part of this whole date was when I realized he was using the same balled up tissue to repeatedly wipe his nose. I’m not sure if it was allergies or a cold, but I know it was unattractive. This was pre-pandemic, so I wasn’t nervous about COVID-19, but I wanted no parts of any other germs he had. Y’all, I’m not talking about one or two wipes; he had to wipe multiple times. I have really bad allergies year around so I know what a struggle it can be, but that balled up tissue was attempting to kill me softly. Then he looked over at me and I’m pretty certain he was trying to figure out how he was going to put his arm around me. Let me tell you, God was with me that day because I don’t know how I would have reacted if he had figured it out. Maybe slide down in the seat or act like I had to go to the bathroom, pretend I got a phone call, and maybe even holler, I just don’t know. But I do know, there was no way he was touching me.

Soon enough the movie was over and I was praying he didn’t want to go anywhere else. It would have made sense considering he drove that distance and we really didn’t get a chance to talk (well, he talked), but the Lord smiled on me again, and we said our goodbyes. I honestly would have agreed to go sit in a coffee shop or go get ice cream, hoping it would make up for the movie but I’m grateful I didn’t have to. We texted a few more days after that but eventually I had to tell him I wasn’t interested. I did feel kind of bad but I’m too old to waste my time or somebody else’s. He wasn’t a terrible person, he just wasn’t my person. So that was my not so good date. What’s yours?

*Certain details have been changed out of respect to the other party involved 

Wasted outfit

Testimony Tuesday: Rebekah

You know the person that always seem so happy and bubbly, like nothing can ruin their day? Everybody who meets them, loves them? Rebekah Evans is that person. The self proclaimed celebrity of her family, Rebekah is the eighth of nine children. She was the good version of preacher’s kids. She explains that as the preacher’s kid you either get talked about for doing all the wrong things or you’re expected to know the whole Bible. So with all the attention on her, Rebekah chose to be the “goody two shoes.” She went to church, prayed, even went to the altar, because of course, that’s what good Christian girls do.

But at the beginning of Rebekah’s senior year of high school, that was no longer good enough. The Christian school she attended would occasionally have speakers come in to motivate students and Rebekah had grown weary of hearing the same old speech, especially from other preacher’s kids. “I had to build my own relationship with God.” “I could no longer live this life for my parents, but I had to experience God for myself.” It sounded so cliche but Rebekah was those people and those people were Rebekah. Not too long after, her church held a conference and Rebekah experienced God in a way she never had before. The freedom in calling on Jesus for herself and not because people were watching or because it was what she was supposed to do, but simply because she needed to. Years of church had told her she couldn’t live a fulfilling life without God and on October 18, 2013, she decided she wouldn’t.

Rebekah had faked being saved for so long, that when God truly did give her a new heart, she took it seriously. She strived to learn more about God by reading His word and she uncovered a lot of truths about herself that weren’t so nice. Although she’s always been outgoing and friendly, she was also prideful and arrogant. Every action required her reaction. It is so easy to overlook these “little things,” and pat yourself on the back for not doing the “big things” (fornication, lying, drinking, etc.), but Rebekah knew all of the above impacted her relationship with God. The Holy Ghost has taught her she doesn’t need to say everything that comes to her mind, she doesn’t have to be the source of everyone’s entertainment all the time, and turning the other cheek may be difficult but it’s necessary. “Being saved comes with more trials but there are also more blessings.” For Rebekah, being saved means giving up complete control of your life to God. His plans overrides everything. Although scary at times, He’s always working for them that love Him and are called according to His purpose (Romans 8:28).

Rebekah is currently pursuing a Master’s degree in directing and producing for film and television. In her spare time she enjoys going to art galleries and museums. She also enjoys traveling. And a little known fact about Rebekah: she loves sports! Her favorite teams are Duke, the Minnesota Vikings, and although I had to drag it out of her, she kind of likes the Chicago Bulls.

I’ve only known Rebekah for about two months but I’ve already decided we’re going to be friends forever. I look forward to hearing her name when the topic of great filmmakers comes up. She will be the example people can look to when asked can you serve God and excel in the entertainment industry.